Morning
by Neemers
Summary: Nobody appreciates Hank


Hank carefully shut down his computer. He'd been up for hours after everyone else, trying to find building materials that were less likely to catch fire, crack, or in a certain escapade involving Bobby, shatter from sub-zero temperatures. But he was finally done and would have all his ideas ready for Charles in the morning.  
  
He'd better get to bed. He knew there was something important going on tomorrow, but he couldn't remember what. Everything between getting out of the lab and getting into bed was a blur. He knew he'd gotten  
  
out of his lab coat, showered, and... and... other stuff, but he couldn't remember what. Now if he could just sleep 'till noon...  
  
____________________________________________________  
  
Hank didn't know how long it had been. All he knew was that someone was in his room and it was barely dawn. He pulled the covers up a little further and quietly swore that if anyone tried to get him up now they'd pay. The noise settled down and Hank smiled to himself as he fell back asleep...  
  
"WE THREE KINGS OF ORIENT ARE..."  
  
Hank sat straight up in bed and stared. Kurt, Jamie, and Bobby should have known they would die for this. Especially Kurt. He had to be the instigator. Hank got a good look at them for the first time and struggled not to laugh.  
  
Bobby was wearing Hank's sweatpants, duct-taped at the waist so they'd stay up and rubber-banded at the bottom to turn them into Aladdin- style pants. creative use of a sheet for the shirt, Jube's flip-flops with the neon pink palm trees on them, and eye-patch, a toilet-paper turban and a Burger King cardboard crown.  
  
Kurt was a little more conservative, in a gi belted with one of Ororo's scarves in the middle-eastern style, a turban made of the same material, and a plastic Wonder Woman tiara. He was also holding two 'camels.' There was a goat wearing a blanket with a ball stuffed under the blanket and Rahne in her half-wolf form on the floor next to it, with a ball in the back of her shirt and smiling at her part in the wake-up.  
  
Jamie was wearing one of the girl's Persian silk robes and an elaborate set of elf boots. The disguise was completed by an unbelievably pathetic Santa- beard and a European crown so big it kept falling over his eyes.  
  
"...TRYING TO SMOKE A RUBBER CIGAR..."  
  
Kurt pulled out a rubber cigar and a lighter, then started working on helping Bobby get a light. Bobby played up to the part, exaggerating movements at puffing at the cigar. It only took a moment for the cigar to catch the light and explode, shooting a tremendous cloud of black soot back into Bobby's face. He stood and gaped as Jamie and Kurt continued.  
  
"...IT WAS LOADED THEN EXPLODED..."  
  
Bobby flipped off the eyepatch, revealing startling white skin beneath, and added with the others...  
  
"...THAT'S WHY WE TRAVELED SO FAR..."  
  
All three bowed and left, Jamie managing to tag a ride on the goat and Bobby trying to tag a ride on Rahne without getting any broken bones. After a moment she whispered, "I'm a camel" and spat at Bobby. In a loud stage whisper, Kurt told her "That's Lama."  
  
Hank considered just sinking back into the covers until he heard further scuffling outside. What else were they up to?  
  
Kitty entered the room first, in a giant, padded bumblebee costume. She was followed by more than half the Institute, all hiding something behind their backs. All the others were wearing normal, Christmas-y clothes, though Bobby still had the soot all over his face. Hank idly hoped they'd cut down on the volume now that he was fully awake.  
  
"OH KILLER BEE, OH KILLER BEE,  
  
HOW DEADLY IS THY STING?..."  
  
Kitty whirled around the room, showing off her martial arts moves even though the costume hindered her movement. There were a few points where it was patently obvious that she'd phased through part of the costume.  
  
"...OH KILLER BEE, OH KILLER BEE,  
  
At {garbled mess} I WISH TO FLING..."  
  
All brought out the pictures hidden behind their backs, which were what they wanted 'stung.' Pictures ranged from the brotherhood (including half a dozen poorly-drawn pics of Pietro doing embarrassing things, courtesy of Evan) to mobsters to politicians to annoying cartoon characters.  
  
"...FILL THEM UP WITH POISON PLEASE,  
  
BRING THEM DOWN TO THEIR KNEES..."  
  
Kitty included the pictures in her martial arts display, shredding each one as she passes by. Most of the pictures were helped along by sparks, fire, well-aimed Tk, or sub-zero temperatures that made them more fragile than glass.  
  
"...OH KILLER BEE, OH KILLER BEE,  
  
"HOW LOVELY IIIIIIS THYYYYYYYY STIIIIIIIIIING!!!"  
  
Everyone sat and waited as Kitty stepped outside to shuck the costume. The they came in to sing one last song together.  
  
"I can open your eyes  
  
Take you far down under  
  
Over sideways and under  
  
On a magic carpet ride  
  
A whole new hell  
  
A dazzling place you don't wanna be  
  
And when you're way down here  
  
It's crystal clear  
  
That now I'm in a whole new hell with you!  
  
(Now I'm in a whole new hell with you)  
  
Unbelievable sights, indescribable torture  
  
Scorching, screaming, and reeling  
  
Through an endless pitch black night  
  
A whole new hell  
  
A new obscene point of view  
  
No one to tell us no, or where to go  
  
Too bad we're not just dreaming  
  
A whole new hell  
  
A thrilling chase  
  
A morbid place  
  
For you and me."  
  
Hank idly wondered just how serious they were, growling slightly as he asked what this was all about.  
  
"It's Christmas," all answered in a spooky tandem. Then everyone was off on why he sould get up. Ideas ranged from Christmas cookies to presents to "So I don't give you a buzz-cut." Still grumbling, Hank allowed the others to pull him out of his room and down the stairs.  
  
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An idea that just wouldn't go away. Songs are from  
  
Feedback is always appreciated. 


End file.
